the struggle

Job Woes: No Money, Mo Problems

I need your advice. Originally, I wanted to ask, “How do you stay at a job you hate?” But that ain’t right. So instead I’m asking, “How do you find a job you love?” This could be one of those posts where I answer my own question(s) before I’m done writing.Job Woes: No Money, Mo Problems - The Palmetto Peaches - palmsinatl.com

I’ve pretty much known my entire life I didn’t want to work in Corporate America. Which brings me to believe

  • I didn’t want to feel stuck in an office.
  • I didn’t want to be micromanaged.
  • I didn’t want to work with a bunch of old people.
  • I didn’t want to get addicted to fast money.

And what do I do when a job becomes one of those things? I quit. Sometimes with a 2-weeks notice, and a few times without warning. Here’s how the job-cycle typically goes for me:

Step 1: Settles for a job I had no business applying for anyway.

This step usually starts with me needing more money for something: a trip, a place to live, trying to touch Beyoncé…etc. I’ve rarely gone on a job hunt feeling like I was on a mission to better the world, which is usually because I need the money.
Job Woes--The Palmetto Peaches

Step 2: Starts to hate the job I accepted.

Step 2 happens for one of the following reasons: the tasks I’m performing were not in the job description; the manager was a lot cooler during the interview; I’m working more hours than I agreed to; or I’m emotionally drained from doing the work that was not in the job description, for more hours than I agreed to.
Job Woes--The Palmetto Peaches

Step 3: Contemplates quitting.

Around this time, I’d rather be doing anything except the job I was hired to do. You know the feeling you get when you finally get a morning to yourself, without a care in the world and you bask in that nothingness? (If not, you should get to know it because it’s my favorite feeling.) A morning like this causes me to ask myself, “Do I really need this job?” “Can I find another job before the next payday?”
Job Woes--The Palmetto Peaches
At this point I start to imagine what it would be like if I completely snapped in the middle of my shift. Am I going to flip a table, throw a phone or toss a plate? Would I literally go out with a bang or nah?

Step 4: Gets paycheck and decides to stay a little longer.

It felt good to order whatever I wanted at the bar, and to not need an extension on my cell phone bill. During those few seconds it took to swipe my card or reach for cash, I’m thinking “Aw girl, this job ain’t so bad”.

Step 5: Starts focusing on my creative outlets & anything that will allow me to work from home.

After a few weeks, or days, on the job I start to get emotionally drained. Whenever I’m not working, I’m coping from working. The urge to do the things I normally enjoy, like long walks to the corner store and learning about social media marketing, becomes very small. So I do what I do best: sign up for webinars and e-courses which are probably titled, “Make Your Dream Salary Right From Your Sofa!”

Step 6: Has an emotional breakdown.

This usually consists of extra long stress naps, over or under eating and watching the most dramatic movies I can find, that will make me feel better about my life decisions. Basically anything created by Tyler Perry or Lifetime.
Job Woes--The Palmetto Peaches

Step 7: Quits.

A few years ago, I was working at a hotel. Before this job, I was working in a candy store–so hell yes I accepted the offer. The hotel was understaffed, but the managers felt the need to take off every weekend. I requested off a weekend in May to attend the Hangout Music Festival (fo free) with my internship. They denied it. Even though I asked 2 months in advance, and worked 45+ hours when I supposed to be part-time, they really told me “nah”. At the peak of my frustration, a friend took me to her job, which also happens to be a bar…a bar I’ve been to several times without a bar tab. Need I say more? The toasts quickly went from “Cheers to Monday” to “She’s quitting her job tomorrow. SHOOOOTTTSSS!!”

…wait, what?

Step 8: Spins into a downward spiral.

Around this time I start to think about all the things I could’ve done differently, like catching the bus instead of taking an $8 Uber, or making a sandwich instead of trying $15 vegan nachos. (The nachos were amazing, by the way.)  When these thoughts start flowing, it means whatever money I had saved is gone: bills are late, wine glass is empty and my phone is dry because I’ve started to ignore people who request my company. Have you ever been unemployed and out with people who have jobs AND money to spare? All they talk about is work and buy $10 drinks. #HelpMeImPoor
Job Woes--The Palmetto Peaches

After completing Step 8, I head back to Step 1.

I’m 99% sure if I saw a therapist and explained to her my employment struggles, she will give it to me straight–no chaser. But in the meantime, I’m asking you. If you love your job, what steps did you take to get there? Is it something that had to grow on you or did you only apply for what you wanted? Help a sista out and let me know by leaving a comment, or tweeting me @PalmsInATL!

Ace Siggy--The Palmetto Peaches

 

2014 Was Drunk

“Go home, 2014, you’re drunk.” Me, everyday last year.

My 2014 was drunk. I’m not talking about that good, fuzzy wine-drunk–I’m talking having a $75 tab on $1 vodka night drunk. This time last year, I was sleeping on my sisters’ couches. After a series of unfortunate events, my cute bachelorette pad in Downtown, Charleston was no more. It didn’t burn down or anything. I was just broke. Whenever I say I’m “broke” my aunt chimes in with some inspirational speech about how being broke or broken refers to losing my spirit, heart and mind. I didn’t lose those things in 2014, but I felt like I was damn close to it.

My drive, my passion, my self-confidence– all of it was packed up in plastic bins and cardboard boxes, right next to my high school yearbooks and photo albums. As much as I’d love to blame the clients who weren’t paying me what I was worth, or the cold weather that made me never want to get out of bed–I can’t. I settled. I got comfortable. I was not myself. I kept a pretty decent poker face though. (Nope, that’s not why the call me Ace.)

Photo Credit: Jennine Jacob

Photo Credit: Jennine Jacob

Lately I’ve been keeping it real with myself. Everything that is happening or already happened, is a result of MY thoughts and actions. My high school Global Studies teacher, Mr. Orvin, told us we could either adapt, move on or go extinct. Adapting aka settling is where I went wrong, and I have too much to accomplish before I go extinct, aka give up–so moving on is my best bet.

I’m not completely where I want to be yet, but 2015 is already better. I’m in a new city, with my own space, working on something I’m excited about. I have a long list of things to not do this year, but instead of dwelling on them–I’ll focus on the things I want to do and achieve.

  1. Meet the Queen Bey. I’d be okay with making eye contact with her, or just caressing her leg–whichever comes first.
  2. Be present. I’m a Capricorn. I’m a worrier. I’m a planner. I get it, whatever. And although those are the things that make me who I am, they can be annoying. I’m trying (like really trying y’all) to not dwell too much on the past, and to avoid trying to fix something that isn’t even broken yet.
  3. Gain and maintain financial stability. Bruh, I am tired of being the friend with the flask in her purse, not because she’s a lush, but because she’s on a TIGHT budget.
  4. Work for MYSELF 100%. I’m still working on my entrepreneurial spirit, but Lord knows I’m tired of the freelance #StrugLife.
  5. Visit 5 cities or states I’ve never been to. My list so far: Savannah, GA; Denver, Colorado…Yeah, that’s it.
  6. Master meditation. When I’m going through it, Oprah and Deepak are my BFFs. I live for their free guided meditation challenges. My goal is to be able to do it on my own.
  7. Fit all my clothes the way I did in 2011. I lost 40lb in 2011 *flips hair*. But I’m pretty sure I gained like 30 in depressing ass 2014.

So far, 2015 is giving me that fuzzy, wine-drunk vibe. I’ll keep you posted if I’m hung over or not. Was your 2014 drunk like mine? What are your goals for 2015? Comment below or share them with me on Twitter @TheAceAlexa!

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