I used to tell myself that I shouldn’t cry because there were people going through so much more than I was. I thought crying (outside of the sappy-movie-watching type of cry) meant I was mentally weak.
All of this is false.
I’m not a person that battles with anxiety or depression, but sometimes I just bad have a bad day or bad days. Plural. Life is hard. Adulting is hard. One of the things I dislike the most is when people try to tell me how I should be feeling. What problems could you really have? Suck it up. It can’t really be that bad.
Well you know what? Sometimes it can be that bad. Stress and sadness can affect anyone. So here’s a pep-talk for anyone else struggling with anything.
Break all the way down if you have to. Because life can get really hard. Don’t let anyone tell you what you’re feeling doesn’t matter or that you shouldn’t be feeling it. It’s okay not to be okay. It’s probably worse to pretend that everything is okay.
Call a friend. Turn your phone on silent. Watch a ton of Netflix movies and continue to tell it you’re still watching. Order that pizza with double the meats and get the bread sticks too. Talk to your dog. Crawl under the covers and wallow for a bit. Drink some tequila and dance it out like Meredith Grey.
You’re human and it’s okay not to be okay. Here’s the thing: have your bad day (or two) but don’t dwell in it. Start putting yourself together. Figure out the root of the problem. Make a plan. Talk to someone. Refocus. This is not the end and you are still here. Heal.
I’ve been belting “Total Eclipse of the Heart” just about every time I come across a solar eclipse story or hear someone mention needing glasses. I’ve seen a lot of questions or confusion about the upcoming total solar eclipse – one friend even asking if special glasses were necessary.
P.S. Yes, they are if you want to keep your eyeballs and not go blind!!
So like the nerd I am I’ve pulled together a little info – just the basics – about the eclipse.
Total Eclipse 101
Wait so what is it?
Basically, a solar eclipse is what happens when the moon passes between the Earth and the sun, blocking out the light from the sun and forming a fast-moving shadow on the surface of our planet.
Why is everyone freaking out?
This is the first total solar eclipse to occur solely in the United States since 1918. For most Americans, this is the best chance we’ll get to see a solar eclipse in our lifetimes. There’s another solar eclipse happening in 2024, but it’s not a coast-to-coast event like this.
Anyways, this go around will put an estimated 12 million people in the path of totality (more on this later). Also, the greatamericaneclipse website, estimates that between 1.85 and 7.4 million people will visit the path of totality on eclipse day. Basically, this is America’s golden ticket to get inside the Wonka factory.
What is “the path of totality”?
Okay folks, so people are going to throw around this term a lot. The path of totality is the 70-mile-wide, 3,000-mile-long area that lies directly in the shadow of the moon. For this eclipse, it will start off the coast of Oregon and sweep across the country to my beautiful hometown of Charleston, South Carolina. If you’re outside the path of totality, you will see a partial eclipse – like a cookie with a bite taken out of it.
What to expect
It’ll happen pretty quickly. From everything I’ve read, the most people will view the full event in about 2.5 minutes. Here’s the funny thing: apparently eclipses give Mother Nature a buzz or drunk goggles, if you will. The sky will grow dark, birds will stop singing, some around the horizon, temperatures will drop, and you might even spot a few stars. Eclipses also confuse Mother Nature, so animals be going a little batty.
What not to do
For the love of pizza, do not look at the sun without some protective eyewear. There’s basically a 50% chance of vision loss. For anyone along the path of totality, you’ll get to take your glasses off temporarily when the moon covers the entire sun. But look, you’re not going to sue me for bad advice. Check out this website for eclipse safety.
So that’s it! Is anyone taking a trip to view the solar eclipse in the path of totality? Or do you live in that area? Leave me a comment below!
We’ve all lip-synced for our lives pretending to be in a music video, but the Bridgeview Babies did the real deal! If you didn’t know — I hosted an arts summer camp for about 15 kids in Bridgeview Village, and apartment complex I lived in over 10 years ago. Our final project was to shoot a music video featuring a song we wrote, and dance we learned.
The title “I Am” came from a list of affirmations we said together as a class every morning. My mission for the Arts Center of Engagement (A.C.E) summer camp, was to encourage self-love and acceptance through the arts. In addition to signs with quotes from Kid President, the motivational words prepped the squad for a great day! Right before dancing it out, the campers would say the following affirmations:
Sometimes they even added extra affirmations like, “I am beautiful”, and “I am unique”, but you’ll hear which ones meant the most to the campers in the song! Check it out below, and share it with all the kiddos you know!
“I Am” Music Video featuring the Bridgeview Babies
What do you think about our music video? Will you sing these mantras every morning to start the day?
I’ve spent approximately 25 hours in the past few months watching Rachel Lindsay as The Bachelorette. I avoided every spoiler and blocked any mention of Reality Steve from popping up on any of my social media feeds or Google cards the entire season, but had my guess which man would get the final rose.
The final episode aired what Chris Harrison would say was one of the most dramatic breakups in Bachelor history. I haven’t seen every season but it was pretty emotional and I think there are some real world takeaways regarding breakups. Okay, but before I get to the real world application I have to admit I was #TeamPeter.
The entire season I fell for what the producers wanted America to see of Peter: perfection. Perfection that came in the form of a former model, with the cutest gapped-tooth smile, salt-and-pepper hair, and swoon worthy moments. Please see the evidence of my infatuation:
And even watching Monday night’s finale, I was all the way here for him making breakfast shirtless and giving Rachel forehead kisses for the rest of their lives. Alas, Peter would not be the last man standing/kneeling and Twitter was outraged.
However, I think Rachel made the right choice. Through editing we only saw them swapping kisses, but it was clear she lit up around Bryan. We’ll have to see if they will be one of the few Bachelor/Bachelorette/Bachelor in Paradise couples to make it, but I’m rooting for them.
Many people were calling Peter reasonable for not wanting to propose after a short amount of time. I applaud him, but I think people are forgetting he was completely aware of how the show works. I saw tweet after tweet and many articles calling Rachel a ring-chaser or claiming she was just after a proposal. It was more than that. Peter’s reluctance wasn’t just about not wanting to rush things. He was actually saying, “I’m not sure I will ever be ready to marry you.”
Rachel had every right to be frustrated that after being very clear of what she wanted, and not wanting to peer pressure him into proposing. That was her decision people. Homegirl, said I’m 32 and I’m over being someone’s girlfriend with no promise that they’ll ever want to commit to me.
Yes, sis!! She asked for what she wanted and would not be persuaded of otherwise.
PETER THE PETTY
After a lot of back and forth about this process ending in an engagement and what the future would like, Peter hurled one of the cruelest, f*ckboy statements out at Rachel: “Go find someone to have a mediocre life with.” My immediate thought was how could Perfect Peter say something so mean to the woman he’s allegedly in love with. It also took reminded me of a breakup where I was lashed out at. Instead of telling me to go have a mediocre life, I was told I would never find love. Anyways, the format of the show is obviously not made for someone like Peter. So if he’s the next Bachelor, I call shenanigans and will be convinced he used Rachel. Compare Peter to Eric (who was rocking a sexy revenge beard), who struggled at the beginning with the format of the show, but eventually came around and took a leap of faith.
The Bachelorette and Breakups: Real World Application
In Rachel’s post-finale interviews she mentions of how she felt manipulated by Peter. He would give her just enough to keep investing in him and then pull away. I’ve been Rachel. Maybe you’ve been Rachel. Not arguing over a proposal, but commitment. Peter is the guy who talks about your future together, but still has Tinder on his phone. Peter is the type of guy that will stay with you for seven years and make a statement like: Why do we need a paper/ring, I already feel like I’m married to you. To be fair, this could be a guy or girl, purposefully stringing you along or saying just enough to keep you. The argument is that Rachel settled for Bryan (for a ring). I think she was always ready and willing to be with Bryan.
So take Rachel’s lead: Be firm in your expectations in a relationship. Don’t settle for the emotionally unavailable man or woman you have to work for.
Any advice on The Bachelorette or breakups? Leave a comment below!
I recently learned that the first week of August is National Simplify Your Life Week. Now I know there are national days and weeks for just about everything, but a little late-summer simplifying will be a great excuse to declutter as fall approaches. However, as I talked about in the minimalism challenge simplifying your life isn’t just about removing the physical clutter out of your closets and cabinets. Minimalism pushes us to examine our lifestyle and eliminate the things that keep us from truly enjoying life.
While there isn’t just one way to simplify your life, I’ve pulled together a list of blogs that may help you in a pursuit for a simpler lifestyle. First up are a few of my blog posts to get you started:
If you’re going to start anywhere, I would suggest The Minimalists – Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus. They’ve got books, a podcast, and a documentary that will help you understand what minimalism is all about.
Un-Fancy was one of the first blogs I found on the topic of simplifying your wardrobe. I’m still battling with this because I love clothes. However, if you’re interested in capsule wardrobes – this is the blogger for you.
Ok, one other area to consider simplifying – finances. Sherry, of Save. Spend. Splurge , managed to pay off $60,000 in just 18 months. So if you’re looking to live more minimally when it comes to financial aspects this is the blog for you.
Lavendaire is a lifestyle youtuber and podcast host. She writes and vlogs about ways millennials can embrace their true potential and create their dream life. She has some great organization and minimalism videos that I love.
29 / Twenty-Fine / 21 + 8… whatever you want to call it, will go down as one of my favorite years. July 19th marked the halfway mark of the last year of my 20s. If you’ve been around since January, you know my birthday hashtag was #TwentyWineSavage, and this year has indeed been the year of the savage.
Halfway Through 29: Year of the Savage
I’ve Learned that…
The smallest gesture can have the biggest impact. About a week ago at work, I waited on 2 men. They were my last table of the night, which means if they would close out and go home, so could I. Instead of rushing or being short, I gave the same ol’ Ace service. After about 2 hours, the older gentlemen complimented me on my smile and service. It turns out he came out to his son 5 years ago, and it put a strain on their relationship.
Rumple Minze is not my friend. If I have more than 2 of them, it’s going to a night fam. That’s all that needs to be said about that.
Not to apologize for the brightness of my light. The only thing worse than constantly bragging about your accomplishments, is not acknowledging them at all. Everyone deserves to get their flowers while they’re here. Don’t be afraid to be proud of yourself or stand-up for your beliefs, because how you think it will make others feel.
What I’ve Done
Executed my arts summer camp. My first adventure with the Arts Center of Engagement (A.C.E) was a success! We went to an art gallery, painted self-portraits, recorded a song and even made a music video! The support from my friends, family and community means the world to me; and I’m excited to share what A.C.E has in store with them.
Supported local businesses and organizations. As much as I shouldn’t be spending any money, when I do spend it’s usually at local businesses. My camp also allowed me to connect with local artists and community leaders.
Made the best memories with people I didn’t even know last year. Watching the sunrise, litty lunches, short day trips to Savannah – the list goes on and on. Even though our #BestLifeSummer17 will end soon, the adventures will continue throughout year 29 and beyond.
How is this year treating you so far? What have you learned and/or done?